Sharing Our Stories: A conversation with Robrenna Redl about race, faith and hope

Kristen Rimer Terrette’s interview with Robrenna Redl 

for Sharing Our Stories

Today, Kristen is sharing an interview that she conducted with her friend Robrenna Redl.

Read a bit about Robrenna below then enjoy her interview!

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Robrenna’s Bio:

Robrenna is a wife, mama, writer, podcast host, coffee lover, and survivor. She describes herself as a real, raw, no-filters kind of girl, so she doesn't do small talk. Robrenna likes to dig deep and be a safe place to have real and hard conversations. 

She is a volunteer for the anti-sex trafficking organization I’ve Got A Name and an apprentice facilitator for the Trauma Healing Institute. Robrenna lives in Lincoln, Nebraska, with Troy who is her husband of 21 years, two young adult children, and her 60 pound labradoodle, Evie.

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The Interview:

Kristen: Hi, Robrenna! Thank you for joining me on Sharing Our Stories. I’m fascinated by all you have your hands in. Your influence is strong and done with excellence, which is very hard to accomplish, so certainly God has His hand over you! Tell us a little bit about your background so we can get to know you, including something fun that’s not on your website.

Robrenna: Thank you for your kind words. Yes, God’s hand is in everything I’ve been doing. He’s challenging me to step out on faith while stretching and blessing me along the way. It’s interesting because I didn’t grow up a Christian. My childhood was a nomadic one. I was born in Chicago, but my stepfather was drafted into the Army, and our first duty station was Germany. I remember playing with the local kids on our cobblestone street, unable to understand a word of the language the other spoke, but still playing and having fun.

Our last duty station was in Texas, where my parents divorced when I was a junior high school. It was tough because we were homeless for a year. Since shelters weren’t available at that time, my mom made a difficult decision to split up the family to ensure we had a roof over our heads. My brother stayed in town with a teammate on the basketball team. My mom and sisters lived in another town 30 minutes away. After living with a cousin in another town for a few months, my friend Anne, who is still my sister-friend today, asked her mom to take me in. That experience shaped the way I see people, see struggle, and see the marginalized.

After quitting college for financial reasons, I joined the military, where I met my husband. I served in the Texas and Nebraska National Guard for 21 years. At age forty, I graduated with my bachelor’s degree in Business Administration. While in the military, my colleague Sergeant Gina Johnson asked me to lunch and invited me to church. I declined her invitation. I told her I didn’t want to be a hypocrite. I’ll never forget Gina told me, “Jesus will take you just as you are.” Although I never went to church with her, I remembered what she said. Ten years after Gina shared her love of God and His love for me, I professed my faith in Jesus Christ. Fun Fact: My friends say I’m the queen of GIFs. I’m also an avid true crime fan to see how detectives put clues together and solve the case.

Kristen: Thank you. You’re a Rockstar! Now, you have two terrific podcasts. Can you explain the purpose and your inspiration behind each one?

Robrenna: When my daughter entered 6th grade, I was a Bible teacher for her class. It was then I noticed girls struggling with the question of, “Who am I?” Therefore, I created a Bible study to help answer this and engage moms to join me in the quest. That’s the inspiration behind my “Mama Take Heart: Understanding Your GenZ Girl” podcast. It is my mission as a podcaster to help moms be the compassionate, gospel-centered, influential voice in their girl’s life. The first few episodes help parents understand the world of GenZ, such as what they value, fear, and their worldview. I also ask guests on the show to discuss different topics like the effects of screen time, social media, anxiety, and trauma, to name a few. I offer practical takeaways and resources to walk alongside their girl, graciously imparting truth.

The other podcast, GRIT-Getting Real while Immersed in Truth, started in response to George Floyd’s death. The first five episodes are Conversations in Black and White. Friends and acquaintances sit with me, a black woman, to have conversations about the state of race in our country. I like to talk about things the church is reluctant to tackle. I began the episodes with race because it’s relevant to what’s happening in our country and the church. The other part of GRIT is for those experiencing church hurt. I experienced this myself, so I want to help people process the anger or grief that accompanies it. It’s much more complicated than people think.

Kristen: You also blog, and one discusses the topic of color blindness. I admit to having used this term before but now believe what you say to be true: “I would rather hear that all our different races, ethnicities, experiences, and backgrounds are of value.” To people who have said this with good intentions, like me, but fell short in understanding the ignorance of it, can you lovingly explain and help us see the faults in the term color blind?

Robrenna: We’ve all used the term color blind during diversity training of the ‘80s and ’90s. Color blindness means acceptance. It falls short because it makes a person of color unseen by devaluing their experiences, culture, and heritage. For Black, Indigenous, and other people of color (BIPOC), a lot of cultural heritage was stripped away to assimilate to the majority culture to be accepted.

As a black woman, the color of my skin has affected my ancestry. People who look like me were kidnapped from their homeland and enslaved in another country. People who look like me couldn’t drink out of the water fountain, sit at the counter in a soda shop, swim in a pool, or go to specific beaches. People who look like me couldn’t live in particular neighborhoods, receive equal medical, educational, and job opportunities, or even apply for a bank loan. All because of the color of their skin. When a person acknowledges the skin I’m in, he or she acknowledges my heritage, struggle that of my ancestors, meaning my parents, grandparents, and so on.

Kristen: Thank you. Great explanation to help us all learn and grow in unity. Okay, so here on Sharing Our Stories, we’re all about getting real and helping open eyes to racial disunity while striving to be a part of the “change we seek” in racial unity. So, get real with us, what are your current hot topics in regard to racial reconciliation? Where are we failing and where are we making strides in the right direction?

Robrenna: I have a family that is multi-ethnic and multi-racial so my husband and I purchased a DNA Ancestry test for our 20th anniversary. My husband is white with 99.6% European, comprised of French, German, British, and Irish. I’m 87% Sub-Saharan African, including West African and Nigerian, Ghanaian, Liberian, and Sierra Leonean. The fascinating part is I’m also 11% Northwestern European consisting of British, Irish, and Scandinavian, and 1.2% East Asian and Native American. I tell you this because one of the current hot topics surrounds the construct of Whiteness. People don’t realize God created ethnicity—which is where ancestry is derived. Race is shared physical qualities and assumptions about a group of people created by an Anthropologist/Biologist, a supporter of Darwinism, and an agnostic Thomas Huxley. It’s a man-made construct.

Whiteness refers to people setting aside their ethnicity as a primary form of identity for the benefits and normalization of being White. When the Irish first came to America, they were mistreated because of their ethnicity. It’s through Whiteness that acceptance is achieved. I say well done to those in the church who recognize all are created Imago Dei and function as such regarding justice, voice, position, and power. To those still grappling with this part of Scripture, to move forward, we must acknowledge and lament the sin of racism, unlearn, relearn, and repent to get to reconciliation. How wonderful would it be to see Revelation 7:9 as the church?

Kristen: You are so right! Thank you for taking the time to share with us. You are an inspiration!

Note to the readers: Follow Robrenna on Instagram or check out her website. Find her podcasts here: Mama, Take Heart Understanding Your Gen-Z Girl and GRIT-Getting Real Immersed in Truth.

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Author Bio:

Kristen's passionate about storytelling and helping people take their next steps in their relationship with Jesus.

She lives forty-five minutes outside of Atlanta, GA. where she served as a Children's Ministry Director for many years. With the support of her husband and two children, she now stays home writing fiction and non-fiction.

She also serves on the women’s leadership team at her local church and writes for Crosswalk and Wholly Loved Ministries. You can check out her articles and novels at www.kristenterrette.com.

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Connect with Kristen:
Website - www.kristenterrette.com
Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/authorkristenterrette/
Twitter - https://twitter.com/KTerrette
Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/kterrette/
Goodreads - https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/16252020.Kristen_Terrette
BookBub - https://www.bookbub.com/profile/kristen-terrette
Pinterest - https://www.pinterest.com/kterrette2/

Sharing Our Stories: Don't be defensive

Challenging Defensive Thoughts
A guest post by Kristen Rimer Terrette

Defensiveness. The desire to challenge or avoid criticism.

When was the last time you felt this way? Maybe when you went on the defense because you perceived a threat to your integrity about a situation?

If you’re on social media, it’s likely you can say this recently happened to you. It seems confrontation and combativeness are a part of daily life on Twitter, Facebook, and Instagram. Even if you weren’t the one who “came out swinging,” you might have felt the need to stand up for yourself or others by merely reading the comments on a feed.

The physical and emotional feelings that come with defensiveness usually aren’t good. I loathe conflict of any kind and will avoid it all costs, but every once in a while, my hackles go up. I’m like a lion in sheep’s clothing. Wanting to remain a sheep most of the time, but when needed the lioness inside can and will make an appearance.

A while back, the lioness appeared as I had a defensive reaction to a situation.

I received a comment from a reader on one of my articles about (in short) God loving and showing off His creativity through our skin colors. The reader asked me, “How would you feel about your daughter dating a person of color?”

Quickly, many defensive thoughts and assumptions ran through my mind. I assumed the person saw my author picture—therefore recognizing I was a white woman—then proceeded to pose this baited question in an effort to trip me up, to expose me as a hypocrite.

Irritation and something very close to anger ran through me. I almost started typing a quick and snarky response. Something to defend myself, like “My daughter has dated men of color already. And we loved each of them.” Those words would’ve had an underlining current, saying, “Ha! You didn’t trip me up!”

But the Holy Spirit pulled me back from typing anything right away and thank goodness for that! 

Because the more I thought about it, the more God birthed in me an even bigger desire for racial unity and reconciliation, as I realized this person did not trust me.

Now, I recognize my initial thoughts were based on assumptions, but it’s like God wanted me to see, through this situation and my reaction, that trust is not a given. If someone or group has been wronged, trust is not handed over freely, no matter your skin color.

This realization changed my viewpoint, and when I did construct a response, I tried to put one small drop of trustworthiness back into an empty bucket for us (White people) as a whole. I hope I achieved this, because it’s so important as we work to undo past hurts.

Trust is foundational for all relationships. When trust is broken, even if you feel like you didn’t specifically cause this break, the relationship is strained. As a White woman, I want to do my part in planting seeds of trustworthiness as I interact with all people.

Next time your own hackles go up, stop and breathe. Process and pray then ask yourself these questions: Where is the root of my defensiveness coming from? What am I not seeing on the “other side of the story”?

Use these answers to challenge yourself, pushing down anger and drawing out love instead.

Let’s make an effort to reestablish trust between each other by listening, learning, and helping one another move toward racial reconciliation.

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Author Bio:

Kristen's passionate about storytelling and helping people take their next steps in their relationship with Jesus. 

She lives forty-five minutes outside of Atlanta, GA. where she served as a Children's Ministry Director for many years. With the support of her husband and two children, she now stays home writing fiction and non-fiction.

She also serves on the women’s leadership team at her local church and writes for Crosswalk and Wholly Loved Ministries. You can check out her articles and novels at www.kristenterrette.com.

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Connect with Kristen:
Website - www.kristenterrette.com
Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/authorkristenterrette/
Twitter - https://twitter.com/KTerrette
Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/kterrette/
Goodreads - https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/16252020.Kristen_Terrette
BookBub - https://www.bookbub.com/profile/kristen-terrette
Pinterest - https://www.pinterest.com/kterrette2/

Sharing Our Stories: A Challenge for you

A Challenge to Learn and Grow Together
A guest post by Kristen Rimer Terrette

Revelation 5 is about praising the Lion, the Lamb, and the Root of David for His victory over sin and death, and His forever reign over all creation.

But this verse. This is one of my favorites. In Revelation 5:9 (NIRV), this is written about Jesus:

“You are worthy to take the scroll and break open its seals.

You are worthy because you were put to death.

With your blood you bought people for God.

They come from every tribe, language, people and nation.”

It paints the perfect picture of Heaven. I love how God’s Word is careful to cover all the bases by mentioning every tribe, language, people and nation. No matter where on earth we reside, or what people group we and our family claim as our heritage, we are combined as ONE in Heaven.

And if our commission is to build God’s Kingdom on earth, so that we look a little more like Jesus on earth every day, then our every day lifestyle must include people from all different backgrounds and cultures.

I’ve been challenged in how I can accomplish this.

Years ago, I was convicted that my everyday life was very neutral, or in my case, vanilla. I’ve mentioned this before, but while I was a children’s ministry director, I realized the kids under my care weren’t as diverse as they should or could have been. I don’t know why I noticed and was bothered by this particularly, but Jesus sure was pointing it out. From then on, I’ve intentionally been open to all types of relationships with people who don’t look like me. Some of these relationships have happened naturally. Some have been more strategic, and I’m still working on this constantly.

I found one of the easiest ways to include people of different tribes, language, nation, and tongue in my life was through social media. It’s that simple! I don’t have to agree politically or even spiritually to see, hear, read, and be opened to the thoughts and ideas of others not like me. The thing is, I have developed relationships and friendships with lots of different people. My compassion level for others, and how I strive to love others well, has amplified. My spirit has joined with the Holy Spirit convicting me and actively engaging me in conversations about race, unity, justice, and Jesus. Anything that does this is worth a try! 

Allow me to share some social media accounts that I follow and love. They give me insight, accountability, and even get me thinking outside my comfort zone. They are from people or organizations representing differing ethnicities—Black, Native, Hispanic, and Asian.

Here’s my challenge for you: Go follow some or all of these social media accounts that I will list below. Commit to a month of watching and reading their posts. This is not the time to input your ideas and try to change someone. This is your time to observe. See what happens! See what God can do in your heart, mind, and spirit. See how He opens your eyes and grows compassion and understanding in your heart.

Anything with the potential to make us better followers of Jesus Christ is worth it.

Read on for the list of some of my favorite Instagram handles. They have challenged my thinking, grown me closer to the heart of God, and given me vision to what Heaven will look like when we are saved in His Kingdom. Most of these people or organizations are also on Facebook and Twitter:

@benjaminswatson

@_kirstenwatson_

@quannyboo

@pastoremase

@morganharpernichols

@tonijcollier

@samcollier

@rondell_trevino

@andcampaign

@changingwomaninitiative

@simijohn

@iammiketodd

@_illuminatives

@emmanuelacho

@ohhappydani

@nicolewalters

@josephprince

@maverickcitymusic

@ruthchousimons

Who do you follow? Comment below with the links to your favorite people so we can learn and grow together!

~*~
Author Bio:

Kristen's passionate about storytelling and helping people take their next steps in their relationship with Jesus.

She lives forty-five minutes outside of Atlanta, GA. where she served as a Children's Ministry Director for many years. With the support of her husband and two children, she now stays home writing fiction and non-fiction.

She also serves on the women’s leadership team at her local church and writes for Crosswalk and Wholly Loved Ministries. You can check out her articles and novels at www.kristenterrette.com.

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Connect with Kristen:
Website - www.kristenterrette.com
Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/authorkristenterrette/
Twitter - https://twitter.com/KTerrette
Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/kterrette/
Goodreads - https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/16252020.Kristen_Terrette
BookBub - https://www.bookbub.com/profile/kristen-terrette
Pinterest - https://www.pinterest.com/kterrette2/

Sharing Our Stories: A real-life story about a woman of color's experiences in America

Kristen Rimer Terrette’s interview with Amanda Brooks 

for Sharing Our Stories

Today, Kristen is sharing an interview that she conducted with her friend Amanda Brooks.

Read a bit about Amanda below then enjoy her interview!

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Amanda's Bio:

Amanda Brooks has been married to her college sweetheart for fifteen years. 

They live in the Atlanta area with their two boys and their dog who doesn’t realize lap dogs are not 110 pounds.

Being surrounded by dudes means there’s never a dull moment in her house. She attended church as a child, but her faith journey was solidified her freshman year in college through the campus ministry, Campus Outreach. She’s an Instructional Specialist which means she teaches both students and other teachers. 

Amanda worships and serves at her local church, doing life with lots of different types of people. She believes in the importance of this type of faith community. It is this group who have held her up and pointed her back to the cross during difficult times and celebrated with her during life’s triumphs. 

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The Interview: 

Kristen: I’m excited to introduce to our readers, my longtime friend, Amanda Brooks. We went to high school together, and, thankfully, through social media, we’ve been able to keep in touch. I’ve followed and loved her faith, intelligence, and reason, all while using her voice and influence with kindness, laced with hope for changed minds and communities.

Tell us about yourself, Amanda!

Amanda: Well, I turned 40 this year, so I think that makes an Xennial, right? I’m the wife to Nick for the last 15 years, and mom to two boys, Preston and Asher. And to Monk the dog who doesn’t realize lap dogs are not 110 pounds. Yes, I’m surrounded by dudes, so there’s never a dull moment in my house, but I’m pretty sure I was meant to be a boy mom. I grew up in the church but didn’t truly come to faith until my freshman year in college through a campus ministry called Campus Outreach. And I, of course, was forever changed. Today, I’m an Instructional Specialist in Atlanta which is a fancy term to mean I teach students in part, and train and support other teachers and staff in part, so let’s just say I’m busy. I worship and serve at East Point Church where I have the honor of doing life with lots of different types of people who have held me up and pointed me back to the cross in my most difficult days and celebrated with me during life’s triumphs.

Kristen: You’re awesome!

Now, being that we went to high school together, even though you were in the super smartie classes, we were taught the same version of historical facts. As an adult, I’ve learned a lot of what’s found in history books is full of half-truths and incomplete or one-sided versions (the White man’s point of view) of events, wars, and time periods. I’m curious, as a child or teen, did you know there was a different narrative of history? Were you taught facts and told of stories by your family members apart from school teachings? Or did you accept as truth the totality of what we were taught?

Amanda: In high school, I had a great history teacher named Mr. Timmons. As a former military man, he was straight forward and didn’t romanticize the uglier side of our nation’s history. Even so, his approach was more like flying in a jet surveying the scene below. Very high level. We learned the information, and he was a great storyteller, but the point was passing our AP exams; to understand causation and overall impact so that we could write about it well. I think this is true for even the better history classes our children learn in today. They are either the half-truths that gloss over actual facts, or they are merely a collection of them from a distance which neglects to discuss what our history means for the everyday lives of people today.

I can’t speak for all people of color, but I think that for many who belong to big close families, there is an inherent need to pass on our oral histories of “how we overcame.” I can’t think of one elder that hasn’t shared what it was like to grow up in America (particularly in the South) and how much harder life had been because of their blackness. And they didn’t share to incite anger, or frustration but rather to inspire the next generation by their fortitude and encourage us to be kids and later adults who could persevere because they knew we’d need to. I was blessed to grow up with older family members who loved to share their life stories and fill in the gaps of what the schools either refused or were unprepared to teach. My greatest observation was that though they had lived full lives of love and family, they all knew that their lives were not valued in society in the same way (if at all) by the country they still loved.

I poignantly remember my grandfather’s stories of his service in the Korean War. He shared that often the “negro” soldiers were placed on the front lines so as to be the first to die and in one instance, he had been part of group that went ahead to detect land mines. He witnessed a comrade being blown up. The fact that experiences such as these had not left him broken and bitter were only a testament to his faith and character.

Kristen: Amen. Thank you for sharing about your family, their service, and their overcoming mentality. It’s an inspiration.

Now, as a teacher and mother, how has this knowledge shaped the way you educate your kids and students?

Amanda: In undergrad, I majored in secondary education for social sciences and minored in African American studies. So as a high school social teacher, I pride myself in providing my students with a complete picture of the world they live in without bias. I ask my students to come to conclusions based on complete facts and solid reasoning. I try to be as neutral as possible because I think history, culture and other world studies speak for themselves when given proper context. So, when we discuss hard topics like slavery in America, or the Holocaust, or any other instance of human suffering, I don’t shy away from delivering the full complete picture, but it’s important they put all this in proper perspective and investigate the “whys and how’s.” Like, why it was possible for slavery to exist in the country so long? What could be the potential impact of these things? What does this mean for you? Where is your place in this narrative or how does this impact how we live today? I guess I don’t ever want my students to simply parrot me, but to instead, walk away from our brief time together better understanding the world so they can be better citizens in it.

As a parent, my approach is far less academic, LOL… I have had to be very REAL with my children, more so than I ever imagined, especially so young. Raising children is hard, but raising black boys today is especially so. Much like my students, I also wish to teach my children HOW to think, not WHAT to think. But in an effort to try and keep them safe and heighten their awareness of the world they live in, I don’t have the luxury of just letting them explore to just figure it out. In so many life lessons, we’ve had to throw out the debate about what’s “fair” or “just” when it comes to what they can or can’t do, because at the end of the day, we are teaching them not just how to thrive, but basic survival skills. Our conversations are laced with lots of “though it’s not fair…this is why you must do things this way or not do things that way.” They understand that until the world is different (which may only be a hope of Heaven) they must engage in it differently than their peers.

Kristen: Your thoughtful answer about your students proves what I already knew—you’re an awesome teacher, and I applaud how you’re championing them to take hold of their future.

And as a mom, your words brought me tears. As a white woman, please accept my apology. I am sorry for the way the world is, and we on the Sharing Our Stories blog series hope the words we put out to the world plant seeds and change hearts and minds.

Now, Amanda, you were our senior class president, a top dog, a stellar student, and super popular—in a predominantly white high school. Our class wasn’t very diverse statistically speaking, and though our area of town gets more diverse each year, it’s still a predominantly white school. Did being a person of color in leadership amongst a lot of white peers affect you in any way, good or bad?

Amanda: One of my most vivid memories was of running for class office in middle school. I had shared with what was known at the time as my gifted teacher, my intention to run for student government president. He told me, “Amanda, I don’t think it’s a good idea. I don’t want your feelings to get hurt if you don’t win. Though you are well-liked, it’s not likely they will vote for a black person.” Of course, I went home devastated and shared what was said with my mother. She was furious and marched into school the next day, demanded a meeting, and explained that under no circumstances should he ever attempt to tell her daughter what she could or couldn't do on the basis of her skin color. She went on to help me decorate a GAZILLION posters and craft my election speech. Now I don’t know if it was the bombardment of posters, the carefully prepared speech, or that it was 8th grade, and I had a lot of friends, but I won!

Nevertheless, his words still scarred me. They made me believe that even those teachers I thought cared for me and knew me, saw me first as black. I think much of my desire to lead was to prove my worth, and it’s something I had to unlearn as an adult and am still “unlearning.” I have had to recalibrate my own understanding of what gives a person value and dignity. And interestingly enough, it has nothing to do with leadership ability or accomplishments.

Kristen: Thank you for sharing that story. I never knew this, but I’m so glad you didn’t let his hurtful words define you or stop you from leading us! I’m wondering, did you feel you had the same opportunities as your fellow white peers in school? Have you felt that way as an adult?

Amanda: This is a tough one. There’s been a lot of conversation around the word “privilege” in recent years. And though I don’t disagree with the tenant that in America, whiteness affords a certain privilege over peoples of color, I also can’t say that it’s a one dimensional conversation. I too grew up with a certain amount of privilege, but mine were attached to socioeconomics. We weren’t rich by any stretch, but I came from a household with two working parents (four really because I have step-parents whom I adore), lived in a middle-class neighborhood where we were THE ONLY Black family for 15+ years, and I was involved in “all the things.”

I was an athlete, a decent scholar, attended church regularly, and had a loving stable family. I am also a black woman and, statistically, tend to fare better than my brothers of color. So, on its face, yes, I seemed to have similar opportunities as my peers for a myriad of reasons.

However, as an adult, I’ve come to realize that so much of opportunity is about exposure. Though I had things, there was a lot about the world that I didn’t know, because it had not been a part of my parents or their parents (and so on) experience. And this lack of knowledge affects so many of the decisions that are made. For example, how does one choose a college to attend (my grandparents went to the ones that accepted blacks and my parents went to the ones they could afford coming from poverty). So, for my family, going to college and finishing was the ultimate goal, so just pick one!

Now don’t misunderstand me, I do not regret my choice in school. It was some of the best years of my life. It’s where I became a Christian, where I met my husband and now father of my children and where I made lifelong friendships. But no one who understood how the system worked (counselors, teachers etc.) shared with me that given my grades, test scores, and extracurricular activities, I had options. No one encouraged me to dream big like they did for so many of my friends. And I can’t account for why not. This is only one example, but I saw this in so many other areas of life.

Kristen: I’m frustrated for you, but so appreciate your willingness to share and the amount of grace you demonstrate in doing so, which brings me to my last question.

As a brother and sister in Christ, I want to be a good listener and be a part of changing our culture’s misgivings, especially when it comes to racial unity. I believe you feel the same way. What’s something you want someone like me to know? To do? That you feel could help us meet this goal. Maybe something you never been able to say out loud? I’m listening! And so are our readers.

Amanda: You know, I have often said that I don’t expect much from “the world.” When people outside of the body of Christ act without love, refuse to listen and affirm, and perpetuate the systems that seek to uphold the status quo, it may sting, but I recognize that I can have no expectation of these things where Jesus does not reside. But...when my family in faith refuses to acknowledge these truths, it’s especially painful. How can one who says they value life from the womb to the tomb as it were, disregard the cries of an entire people group when they say they’re hurting? Systematic racism exists. I think when some white people hear this, they think a finger is being pointed AT them personally. And they say, “I didn’t do anything. I’m kind to my neighbor. So, this argument is flawed, because I am proof things have changed.”

What’s interesting about this stance is that as believers we understand that through Adam’s original sin, and not necessarily through any action of our own at birth, we are born into sin. We have inherited a “system” because of the actions and fallenness of our ancestors. And we don’t take offense when people call us sinners. We rightfully shout, Hallelujah, thank God for a Savior. But when asked to acknowledge that the sins of forefathers have established systems that are present today which directly benefit white people and harm people of color, there is shirking away.

So, it makes me question, is it the sin you don’t want to acknowledge or the benefit you don’t want to lose? I love being an American, even with all its challenges. However, I think our national identity of being individualistic has eroded a central mission of the church. We’ve forgotten what it really means to live in community and to provide for the “least of these.” We’ve allowed ourselves to believe that if we’ve contributed to the can drive, coat closet, mission fund, we’ve done our part. Loving our neighbor means being willing to sacrifice some of our own comfort, so that “the least of these” can also live with dignity and without fear.

So, I would challenge us all to think about how we are really living out the Gospel mission.

I would also challenge believers to diversify their circles. @ohhappydani on Instagram sums the importance of “taking inventory of your inclusivity” nicely. She challenges us to take stock of whether we have diversity in the following areas: our inner circle of friends, the leaders we learn from, our place of worship, our beauty standards, the toys we buy our kids, and the businesses we patronize. Of course, this is not an exhaustive list, but it’s a great start. If you look at this list and realize the people in your areas all look the same, that should call for pause and reevaluation.

Kristen: Amen! I was literally clapping and nodding the first time I read your response. Readers, go back and reread those words again!

Amanda, you are a voice to be heard! Keep speaking! I’m hearing you and honored to know you. May God bless you and your family greatly for your courage and grace. Thank you for taking the time to share with us.

Readers, you can connect with Amanda on Instagram at @ladybrooks625.

~*~
Author Bio:

Kristen's passionate about storytelling and helping people take their next steps in their relationship with Jesus. 

She lives forty-five minutes outside of Atlanta, GA. where she served as a Children's Ministry Director for many years. With the support of her husband and two children, she now stays home writing fiction and non-fiction.

She also serves on the women’s leadership team at her local church and writes for Crosswalk and Wholly Loved Ministries. You can check out her articles and novels at www.kristenterrette.com.

~*~
Connect with Kristen:
Website - www.kristenterrette.com
Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/authorkristenterrette/
Twitter - https://twitter.com/KTerrette
Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/kterrette/
Goodreads - https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/16252020.Kristen_Terrette
Bookbub - https://www.bookbub.com/profile/kristen-terrette
Pinterest - https://www.pinterest.com/kterrette2/

Sharing Our Stories: The things we say

Please Stop Saying …
A guest post by Kristen Rimer Terrette

“Slavery ended over 150 years ago … I never owned slaves … I’m not privileged. I’ve had hardships too … Everyone has the same rights now!”

Do these sentences make you sigh? Part of me wants to rant when I hear them. Part of me wants to cry. White brothers and sisters, can I speak solely to you for a moment?

In my experience, these words are usually said in defense by my well-meaning white friends or acquaintances who feel they haven’t contributed to racism or displayed hatred toward people of color. They feel they’re not part of the problem. And in part, that’s true, because they don’t use racial slurs, shy away from friendships with different ethnicities, and may work cordially alongside people who don’t look like them.

But my frustration with these statements is that they degrade people of color’s experiences with racism, prejudice, and injustice, as well as their victories.

They also put us, the white majority, in a position of complacency and indifference.

Let me lay out some realities …

A few weeks ago, November 14, 2020, marked sixty years since six-year-old Ruby Bridges walked into a previously, like literally until that very moment, all white school in Louisiana. What a brave little girl! What a courageous mother to send her that morning!

To back up a bit more, in May of 1954, only six years earlier, the Supreme Court ruled in Brown vs. the Board of Education that “state-sanctioned segregation of public schools was a violation of the 14th amendment and was therefore unconstitutional.” It took six years for this decision to trickle down to Ruby Bridges’ town. Six. Years. For a ruling over something that should have never been in place at all.

And my mother’s city, Chattanooga, TN, took even longer. It was 1963-1964 when her school desegregated. Almost ten years after Brown vs. the Board of Education ruling! Ten years for her school, and the surrounding area, to implement desegregation.

So, let’s talk some facts. I’m in my thirties (though my very late thirties, but let’s not go there). I have school-aged children, with one still in elementary. And my mother (my kids’ grandmother), who is only in her mid-sixties literally witnessed (as in a firsthand account) the very first black children being admitted into her previously all white grade school. And she was ten years old at the time—not a baby, not a kindergartener, but a child about to go into middle school.

This should put things in perspective for those who feel like the civil rights movement happened a long time ago. There is only one generation—mine—between the children who witnessed desegregation and the children who are seeing the racial tensions we’re witnessing now.

Only ONE generation.

Truth is slavery as an institution ended on paper roughly 150 years ago, but that’s only about six generations back by my count. And its oppressive affects lasted much longer. In fact, they are still being felt today.

Please, hear my heart, and let my information dump serve as a plea for us to live as Paul asks us to in 1 Corinthians 12. He eloquently discusses the importance of being of one accord in a passage aptly titled, Unity and Diversity in the Body (the church). According to this passage, Paul says in 1 Corinthians 12:25-26 (NIV), “so that there should be no division in the body, but that its parts should have equal concern for each other. If one part suffers, every part suffers with it; if one part is honored, every part rejoices with it.” 

Our Christian brothers and sisters have stories to tell. Ones of grief and ones of triumph. So, we must rid our minds and tongues from the demeaning phrases above. And, instead, listen to people of color who still struggle with the painful effects of racism, but who are afraid to tell their stories because of the responses they get in return. We must also celebrate greatly all minorities who have accomplished so much in such a short amount of time instead of diminishing their victories with flippant responses or, and possibly even worse, by acting like we understand their pain in these areas.

Let’s take Paul’s advice and approach our diverse relationships by asking Jesus for spiritual eyes and ears to listen and celebrate each other. We are one body of Christ after all.

People of color, do you have a story to tell? We’re ready to listen, so let’s keep the conversation going! Comment below or on social media to tell us your story, whether one of heartache or victory. We want to listen, learn, and celebrate with you.

~*~
Author Bio:

Kristen's passionate about storytelling and helping people take their next steps in their relationship with Jesus. 

She lives forty-five minutes outside of Atlanta, GA. where she served as a Children's Ministry Director for many years. With the support of her husband and two children, she now stays home writing fiction and non-fiction.

She also serves on the women’s leadership team at her local church and writes for Crosswalk and Wholly Loved Ministries. You can check out her articles and novels at www.kristenterrette.com.

~*~
Connect with Kristen:
Website - www.kristenterrette.com
Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/authorkristenterrette/
Twitter - https://twitter.com/KTerrette
Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/kterrette/
Goodreads - https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/16252020.Kristen_Terrette
Bookbub - https://www.bookbub.com/profile/kristen-terrette
Pinterest - https://www.pinterest.com/kterrette2/

Sharing Our Stories: Saying "Yes" to God

When I Am Weak, God is Strong
A guest post by Kristen Rimer Terrette

I’m scared, y’all.

Have you ever committed to doing something you feel God desires from you, then as this very commitment approaches, you find yourself wanting to renege? That’s where I am.

I’m sitting in that tension, screaming inside, and with a racing heart, thinking, “God, what did I say yes too?! I’m not equipped! I’m not knowledgeable! I’m not enough!”

You see, not only have I agreed to participate in this Sharing Our Stories blog, but I’m beginning a church small group about racial reconciliation.

Me. A white girl in a predominantly white suburb (though changing more every day) of Georgia and, true to these statistics, one who attends a predominantly white church.

What can I do? Honestly, I’m part of the problem. Or at least I was, without a doubt, before I worked through the topics of the study I’m facilitating. Topics like awareness, lamentation, confession, forgiveness, and repentance. And even still, having done some internal work in my heart and having conversations with close friends and my husband over the years, I don’t know how to help people along on their journey toward acknowledgement, confession, healing, and growth—the very things that must happen for reconciliation to be realized. So many other are more qualified, even in my own church!

This was glaringly evident last Sunday when I was asked by a church member what made me want to start a group around racial unity. My first instinct was to cringe, because knowing a bit about this church member meant that, most assuredly, he’s further along in his journey toward correcting any previously held biases and prejudices. I felt inadequate immediately, not because of anything he did, but because of my own insecurities.

But after my initial recoil, words flowed easily. Something like (though probably not as eloquent as I’m remembering), “There are people of color my life who I care deeply for. These relationships have lasted for many, many years. They are family. They come to Thanksgiving and Christmas at my home. They celebrate and grieve with me. They love me, and I love them. And once my eyes were unveiled to the injustices and pain they’ve been through, I felt sheer sadness over their oppression and sorrow.”

Knowing my loved ones had dealt personally with racism and hatred, meant I could no longer live in oblivion. My heart aches for them and that heartache makes me want to face my own part in their pain and work toward learning, listening, and doing something to help tend to their wounds.

But is it enough? Is this my own ambition? And what difference could a group or a blog post make in this chaotic world? I’m so small. So weak.

In my quiet time, as I prayed over this, God reminded me of 2nd Corinthians, chapter 12. Here, Paul describes a vision from God where he pleads three times for the Lord to take away the “thorn of his flesh” (2 Corinthians 12:7 NIV). In verse nine, we read God’s response to Paul’s cries, “‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.’” The verse continues with Paul’s acceptance of his challenges, “Therefore I (Paul) will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.”

It was like God bonked me on the head and added a playful eye roll. My role in these commitments didn’t matter. My insufficiencies only release God’s power as I walk along His path for me. I cried (recently) for Ahmaud Arbery, George Floyd, Breonna Taylor, and my loved ones who I worry about facing brutality. But, also for Eric Garner, Tamir Rice … and the list goes on … I’d told God in these moments I would say yes to whatever He asked me of me.

And that was the only step He needed.

He wants my obedience, because my weaknesses aren’t a problem for Him. They only make His power shine perfectly. He’ll do the work. He’ll bring the people to the small group. He’ll bring the words for our blog posts. He’ll bring readers who are ready to go out and “do” good for Him in the world. His power is all we need to spark change.

I love that Paul adds in 2 Corinthians 12:10,“That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.”

What step are you afraid to take but feel God asking of you? One where you feel ill-equipped for, but a passion for the cause has been stirred in your heart that you can’t deny? 

Guess what? God put that passion there. He’s ready to come in power. In fact, that’s the only way He can come. So, take the step of obedience and delight in that feeling of weakness, because when you are weak, God says, because of Him and His Holy Spirit, you are strong.

With all our obedient steps combined and with God by our side in power, we can make a difference and inspire a change of heart.

~*~
Author Bio:

Kristen's passionate about storytelling and helping people take their next steps in their relationship with Jesus. 

She lives forty-five minutes outside of Atlanta, GA. where she served as a Children's Ministry Director for many years. With the support of her husband and two children, she now stays home writing fiction and non-fiction.

She also serves on the women’s leadership team at her local church and writes for Crosswalk and Wholly Loved Ministries. You can check out her articles and novels at www.kristenterrette.com.

~*~
Connect with Kristen:
Website - www.kristenterrette.com
Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/authorkristenterrette/
Twitter - https://twitter.com/KTerrette
Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/kterrette/
Goodreads - https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/16252020.Kristen_Terrette
Bookbub - https://www.bookbub.com/profile/kristen-terrette
Pinterest - https://www.pinterest.com/kterrette2/

Sharing Our Stories: Introducing the writers

Introducing Kristen Rimer Terrette, in her words:

I’m a white woman living in the suburbs of Atlanta. 

I’ve spent my whole life in the south, and I truly love southern traditions like big Sunday dinners and back porch swinging, sweet tea and everything fried, Chick-fil-A and farmhouse-style anything. 

Down here, we boast about having all four seasons show off in vivid color (though summer seems to last at least six months!) and our gigantic love of college football (like really, it’s insane). And I’ll admit, my husband and I entertained the biggest southern cliché of all… Our son’s name is my grandmother’s maiden name. I know…you don’t get more southern, and cliché, than that.

But this culture, the one that has seeped into my everyday life, is also soaked in racial injustice, the sting of oppression, and blindness (through ignorance or a purposeful turning away) to disunity going on right before our eyes. My awakening journey to this problem started years ago. I looked around my children’s ministry, as its director, and at my own personal life, and noticed it wasn’t as diverse as it should be. And since heaven will be filled with “every tribe and language and people and nation” (Revelation 5:9 NIV), my life needed to be this way also. A passion for unity and diversity was birthed then. And as I learned, listened, and repented, my desire to be of use to God as a reconciler grew stronger.

But who am I? My voice is small compared to the loud one of the enemy, who’s plan is “to steal and kill and destroy” (John 10:10 NIV) by carving out more dissention in God’s people, and causing more anger and pain to the oppressed.

Thankfully, God knows combined voices get loud. Together, we can drown out and drive away the enemy in Jesus’ name. So, I hope to my use my meager influence, one that has benefitted from white privilege and led a life of white fragility, to share my perspective, to help open veiled eyes to past atrocities, systematic racism, prejudices, and complicit behavior.

I want to share my own stories, as well as those in my circle and community, to challenge our culture, especially here in the South, and impact my generation, which will be a source of change for the next generation.

If you’re reading this, it’s likely we want the same thing. A unified church body. The enemy has conquered our land and people far too long. He has lied to us, blinded us, and kept us separated. Through this blog’s platform, let’s share our viewpoints and ongoing journey to reconciliation. Let’s open up conversations that help change hearts, biases, and prejudices. 

I believe if we do the hard work needed to break the enemy’s stronghold over our minds and our society, and as we strive to forgive, lament, and move forward, our children will see this unification happen.

~*~
Author Bio:

Kristen's passionate about storytelling and helping people take their next steps in their relationship with Jesus.

She lives forty-five minutes outside of Atlanta, GA. where she served as a Children's Ministry Director for many years. With the support of her husband and two children, she now stays home writing fiction and non-fiction. 

She also serves on the women’s leadership team at her local church and writes for Crosswalk and Wholly Loved Ministries. You can check out her articles and novels at www.kristenterrette.com.

~*~
Connect with Kristen:
Website - www.kristenterrette.com
Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/authorkristenterrette/
Twitter - https://twitter.com/KTerrette
Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/kterrette/
Goodreads - https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/16252020.Kristen_Terrette
Bookbub - https://www.bookbub.com/profile/kristen-terrette
Pinterest - https://www.pinterest.com/kterrette2/